What a tragic death reminds me about life.
This week I heard the terrible news that one of my oldest and dearest friends was in an accident and struggling for his life. Friends near and far lit candles and held each other tight, upholding a space of peace for the family of Sal Wilson.
Yesterday I got the news that the miracle we all were holding hope for was not to be.
Sal transitioned onto that next great adventure that none of us can know. But what I have been reminded of in the short week of this heart wrenching event, I won't soon forget.
Love is Alive (not just a song by the Judds)
I grew up in a unique time and place, those of us who were a part of the Ozarks upbringing in the 70’s hold each others hearts, stories and lives together in a sacred web. Sal’s accident and death shook our web and reminded us all that we must continue to care for one another in word, deed and action.
The love that we shared runs like the groundwater that flowed beneath us. We are nourished by the invisible power of life held in the water. That water and our collective love bubbles up in moments, deep in canyons, it penetrated solid rock, it travels to the depths and back. Most of the time you don't even know it's there. And the better we care for our water, and the more we love each other, the more we will be nourished.-MMR (upon hearing of Sal’s passing)
Say YES! to all the adventures.
To say that Sal is on a new adventure is exactly how Sal lived his life. I have never had a friend so match my “hold my beer”, attitude for life.
Sal and I jumped off every cliff and a few bridges too, Sal was one of the few people I took to my “secret spot”. It was a cave high above the river. When I told him it was a safe place to jump he seemed dubious, which made me nervous since Sal was such a say, “YES!” friend. So before we jumped we scaled down the cliffside and swam around searching the depth and looking for underwater obstructions. Once he was satisfied, we climbed back up to the little cave and spent the afternoon getting our adrenaline high over and over.
Sal was the first person to take me rock climbing. I climbed every crevice I could with him. We camped in cars, on mountains, in valleys and in middle of rivers.
When Sal finally got the truck he had worked and saved for, we drove all over three counties desperately searching for a place to challenge his four wheel driving techniques, all the while blasting the Beastie Boys.
Share deeply and be vulnerable
I wanted to tell you about Sal partly to work through my own grief, but also to memorialize some of the stories of Sal for his young daughter Wren. There are so many friends with so many tales of adventure and the silliness that Sal brought to life, but he also came with a healthy fire for connection.
On all of our jaunts to test the teenage boundaries, Sal was incredibly open about what he wanted, how he felt and he always shared intimately his fears and regrets.
My favorite intimate moment was when Sal told me he met someone special. Her name was Hana. This part I remember exactly, he said, “She is really cute, but I was worried she was going to be a stuffy English girl”, he giggled in his signature Sal way and continued, “Then I saw her eating peas and she just used her finger to push them up onto the fork and I new she was gonna be cool.” He smiled so big and it made my heart happy.
Today is the Day, Don’t delay.
Do not wait to tell people what they mean to you. Sal never held back reminding me how happy he was that I followed my heart and moved west, or that I got married and had kids. Love is precious, life is for living and adventures abound.
Love you Sal.
somewhere in the ozarks. sometime in the 90’s